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WHAT’S BETTER? SEX LIFE BY DEFAULT OR BY DESIGN?

How can you assure that 2021 will be your sexiest year ever?

(Thought: this article is written with couples in mind but the main advice applies just the same to the single folk – if you want a life filled with sexy satisfaction, that is.)

We are sold a myth that passion will sustain our intimate relationships.

If we love someone that means we’ll always be hot for them.

I’ve got some news: That’s simply not the case.

When you first meet and feel those warm fuzzies all over, you’re in the limerence phase, the early hormonal stage of attraction. This powerful hormonal soup that floods our systems in the beginning of a relationship is why we literally lose our minds over a new lover.

The early morning texts. The amazing morning (or afternoon, or evening, or anytime) sex.

The steaming coffee in bed.

The goofy gaga eyes.

The racing heart.

This obsession is fun, but it’s very unreliable.

It fuels your turn on, until it doesn’t!

This hormonally hopped up limerence stage typically lasts 12 to 24 months.

One theory about this time frame is that this amount of time is just long enough to get pregnant and to bring the baby to term. Ah biology!!

This intense attraction is part of a natural cycle, but it is also natural that it will fade.

Natural or not, it can get confusing and depressing when that “can’t keep your hands off each other” lustiness fades away.

It doesn’t mean you don’t love each other any more. It simply means you’re in a new stage of relationship.